Aajkal

Pandit Nehru wrote in his book that as we grow older we stop looking forward to our birthdays. They are no longer happy events but just reminders of us getting older. I never quite understood this concept till I turned 26 this year. However in my case it wasnt just the advancing age that made me pensive rather it was getting older and being single that was worrisome.
Actually I am quite happy most of the times,I can go and come when and whereever I want.And do as I like most of the times.But then the world is so worried about your being single that you also start worrying.
This actually made me sit back and think what is so alluring about being single? Man is a social animal and woman well they can hardly stay without it. Afterall gossip,fashion,style and this has tobe exchanged. And then you need to date,flirt and stare at men too. You can do all of that with different set of people and be happy. You are not obliged to with one person. You can always be with the happy and going out people. But then we are basically insecure people and hence have this constant urge of calling something our own. So whether its a house, a car or people we have to have it just for us. Hence we get married,committed etc. So does that mean people get married to own people? Maybe ,maybe not. I heard someone remark that people get married to legitimise sex. Is that right? Hmmmm.... I dont know. Infact I also read some where that there are three types of marriages- arranged, for love and for convenience. So do the earlier assumptions fit a certain type of marriage and not all. Or is it that it fits all but in only some proportions? Maybe could be!
Well I have strayed. This wasnt about marriage but about being single. Well first we need to establish what does being single mean. Does it mean being not married or just being alone? Lets just agree that it means that it means not married. So what does a single's life look like? Hmmm should I say its fun or is atleast better than getting married? I wouldnt be able to select the second option as I have not been married so let us explore another perspective. Well I have often thought that our lives revolve around other people like our parents ,siblings,friends etc. Somewhere between being somebodies daughter/son, sister/brother, husband/wife, father/mother we lose ourselves.We loose the me. I think its this "me" that you sometimes catch glimpse of when you are single. Thats probably because the roles you are playing are lesser and bear less responsibility. But then does having found "Myself" make me happy? Maybe not?

Labels: Being Single

posted by DeepInThought @ 11:48 PM 0 comments

Hindu/Muslim/Christian or Indian
I have never been a very religiously inclined individual. Rather I am an opportunity inclined individual who approaches god only when in need. Hence when I see people acting fanatic in the name of god I am puzzled.
I have always been fascinated by the minorities. The pretty faces behind the burka, the ladies in skirt celebrating christmas and sweet old parsees. I have always been curious and eager to make friends and read about the religions and communities of these kind. I have wanted to understand what is so different about them from us Hindus. They dress quite different but dont look different from each other. In a neutral attire can one make out the difference?
Being in a city where the nerve is the train which carries people of different class,age,sex ,community and religion, I get to meet a lot of people who have caught my attention. Also a number of writers like Rohiton mistry ,Shantaram, Suketu Mehta have helped understand these communities better. One gets to hear and feel the worries ,their achievements and highs and lows all the time.I have often wondered that people who look alike,think alike , live and feel alike can be different. Is religion a larger difference or being Indian a smaller commanility? When a riot happens, what pains more? Death of an innocent individual or death of a hindu/muslim?
I had an opportunity to meet some very nice people of probably India's smallest majority -Jews. Till I met them I had no idea that India had Jews at all. I had read and heard so much about this community that I was intrigued. I guess my curiosity overcame the usual suspicion about any other religion. After enjoying a hearty meal and extremely warm hospitality I sat down to think what differentiates them from me or any other hindus I knew? I want to go back and enjoy their company once again. Am I normal?
I have never really understood the fanatism about religion. What makes people of a certain religion better of worse than others? And most importantly what exactly does being religious mean? Does it mean praying day in and day out or visiting a holy place or killing people or just being a good human being? Who is a more religious person- the man who planted bombs to kill innocent people in name of religious cleansing or the one who is helping the people tirelessly outside hospitals? Both of who belong to the same religion.For how many more years will we go on killing?
So goes for racism. The world cup has also forced me to think. One of the most racist countries in the world i.e. France has a majority Afro-french players and their star is a Algerian Muslim. His biggest blunder in the world cup was forgiven by the French even before it was committed. Did the French just forget their prejudice or is it that prejudice is for convenience?How come Amitabh Bachchan/Madhuri Dixit are one of the biggest stars in Pakistan? And Shahrukh and Irfan Khan in a Hindu Majority State India?
Perhaps there are no answers to these questions but can there be a way to atleast make poeple think about it. Will there ever be a utopian world where everthing will be fine. There would be no hatred and killing. Where all will be respected?! Maybe not but atleast the hope of its existence gives us a reason and will to do our part honestly and tireless.

posted by DeepInThought @ 12:15 AM 0 comments